The Hills Have Eyes Part 2 (1984)

The Hills Have Eyes Part 2 (R) - Review

"But the Director Doesn't"

No apparently they don't, they don't have eyes. Which makes them lucky ones since they'll never be able to watch this abysmal sequel about a group of bikers who return to the high desert where their friends were attacked by inbred cannibals 8 years earlier.  The film is half finished, cobbled together with loads of footage from part 1 into a  jumbled mess of lazy long flashbacks jumbled with new scenes so bad you'll wish they'd go back to flashbacks, a sick loop of incestuousness rarely scene in cinema.  The only stylistic connection to the original is the halfhearted Rubegoldberg ending that ends up so hamfisted it ends up tacky with burnt honey glaze.

Unlikeable characters, unforgivable plotting and unflattering camera work, they all scratch the chalkboard with such dull stupid fingernails that it is little wonder Wes Craven disowned the director credit to the film.  With his blossoming Nightmare on Elm Street franchise ringing in the same year, Craven must have felt like a man on death row who just recieved a career reprieve at the midnight hour.

1.5 Even The Freaking Dog Has A Flashback!?!?s out of 10 (AWFUL)