World War Z (2013)

World War Z (PG-13)

"Product Placement 'Pocalypse"

A blight was released upon the Earth in 2013, and its name was World War Z.  Produced and starring Brad Pitt (Fight Club) as a former UN investigator who is drawn into a worldwide crisis involving the undead after his family's near escape in Philadelphia, the movie tries to differentiate itself from the modern Zombie zietgiest by maintaining a wimpy audience friendly PG13 rating and mass pop culture appeal instead of true horror epic the novel's street cred lent it.  Based loosely on the novel by Max Brooks, the similarities almost end at the title.  Instead of Brook's use of traditional slow moving Z's of the "They're coming to get you, Barbara"  variety and their practical strengths and weaknesses, the movie has screeching/sprinting snappers whose nearly invincible CGI avatars and insect like behaviors are a simple mechanic to shriek from one action location to the next (said action being well done and tense when not weighed down by the plot's clammy grasping hands of stupidity and unrealism).

The lip service spent on Brooks World War Z is very brief:  Yes Zombies outbreak taking over entire continents, Yes they originated in Asia and spread by planes, Yes humans must find unique techniques to protect themselves and fight off the menace (if only in the films last few minutes however).  Instead the longer exclamation made by the film is "How cool is Brad Pitt huh?":  He rescues his shrill wife and cardboard children from danger without ever losing his cool as a cucumber dadhood, travels around the world investigating razor thin evidences that only he is intelligent enough to notice, survives the ransacking of a well prepared Jerusalem (in direct conflict with the written material by the way) and survives an impossible plane crash which he causes.  It's a milky eye rolling affair, all the more horrifying in that the entire 3rd act of the film (and actual Zombie conflict) being scrapped in favor of a multimillion dollar reshoot to end the movie's thrid act with even more Pitt heroics and family friendly PG13 censorship.  Instead of focusing on the titular war supposedly raging around it, the film's plausibility takes a screeching 90 degree dive for the mainstream, changing the ending into a pointless hide and seek in a cheap looking WHO lab filled with the undead as Pitt single-handedly searches for the Zombie's only weakness, finds it, exploits it ANNNND roll final weak exposition and end credits!

The serious lack of gory violence or brutality alone is a huge gaping plothole for WWZ, as is the disrespect for the decently thought out source material and obvious use of a pretty boy superstar to panhandle for larger box office returns.  Whether Zombie cultists, Book aficionados or Horror film fans will also return seems less likely as it's own inevitable sequel.

4 Wish Bub were here to pop a cap in Pitt out of 10 (BAD)