Grizzly (1976)

Grizzly (PG)

"Grin and Bear it"

In this goofy above ground-Jaws ripoff set in an unnamed National Park, a mysterious Grizzly starts eating nubile, barely-clothed women, attracting the attention of the Chief Ranger and resident Marlboro man, who must track down and stop it's murderous rampage.  Highly derivative of Jaws (his boss won't close the park!  they need to hire an expert to track him!  there a natural scientist on the crew!) done on the way cheap, Grizzly is a matted burr filled pelt with little intrinsic value.  The main actors are mostly TV veterans from a bygone era, the extras are obviously amateur hour.  They tease the bear ala the shark by only showing fur wrapped claws for the first half, and when they do show the lumbering fuzzy wuzzy later the color of it's fur often varies from shot to shot!  There is some fake blood, disregard for life & limb and man vs nature (and his boss) drama, but its oddly underwhelming forests, smallness of scope, inappropriately scored soundtrack, flashes of exploitation and hunters constantly discarding their firearms frustrate like a 10 mile uphill hike to nowhere.  This gas guzzling Grizzly should have hibernated this one out.

3 Park Rangers with a Bazooka out of 10 (BAD)

The Milpitas Monster (1976)

The Milpitas Monster (NR) - Review

"This Place is a DUMP"

What started off as a High School film class project blossomed into a full fledged giant monster film inspired by the likes of King Kong and Godzilla. The Milpitas Monster is a triumph of small town Americana that rings the bells of nostalgia for a time recently past.  The effects are admirable due to their limitations, the acting for the same reasons.  The movie's  love of old monster films is core, what with the teens trying to rally their ignorant parents into rounding up the Landfill spawned and garbage devouring creature.  Both a wonderful look into life in 1970s Silicon Valley and the spirit of its inhabitants, The Milpitas Monster surprises with its witty homage and professional exuberance while maintaining a Home Movie level shoestring budget. 

7 High Schoolers Did This? out of 10 (GOOD)

The Song Remains the Same (1976)

The Song Remains the Same (PG) - Review

"And they are buying a stairway..."

Led Zeppelin's cult classic is a rock and roll thunderbolt with a chaser of LSD.  The standard concert footage, filmed in the band's apex of popularity, is intercut with varying successful stories chosen by the individual band members.  Some of these are fantastical in nature, some irrationally bizarre, all synch psychedelically with the masterful music of Zep.  The film itself had a troubled production and it shows, but simply being able to see the band in their prime artistically and sonically makes up for any silly post-60s shakiness.  Self propaganda for sure, but these guys wrote the book (or shot the movie) about sex, drugs and rock and roll.

8 LOTR Referrences out of 10 (GREAT)

Logans Run (1976)

Logan's Run (PG) - Review

"Everybody runs... away from the screen"

An obvious product of the "Don't trust anyone over 30" generation, Logan's Run is a ridiculously long SciFi blunder that has achieved cult status for its cheesy psychedelic visions of tomorrow.  It is the year 2274, and humanity has sheltered itself from its radioactive fallout in a rigidly closed-off utopia. The only rule is Carousel, where anyone who is of age must submit to public execution. When a Sandman (or policeman) by the name of Logan (Micheal York) gets involved with a conspiracy between his computer run beuracracy and the antisocial runners, the adventure drags him and his female companion to seek sanctuary beyond the reach of the known world, out into the ancient wastes of civilizations.  Finding new friends and old enemies, Logan must try to rehabilitate his fellow citizens and repopulate the world.  The cheese hasn't aged well, the effects and music even worse.  Like its crumbling post apocalyptic views of Washington D.C.and the floor of the Senate, Logans Run is a relic whos questionable value is mainly historic.

3 Hand Crystals out of 10 (BAD)